BULLYING IN THE WORK PLACE
Author: Sarah Binding

When most people hear the word bullying they automatically think of bullying in schools. However there is another kind of bullying that is happening every day and all over the country. Bullying in the work place is all too common and it is a very frightening and isolating experience for those who suffer at the hands of the bullies. Victims are made to feel frightened, useless, and full of shame and embarrassment. Being bullied at work can lead to depression, anxiety, stress, sleeplessness, loss of appetite, complete loss of self confidence, panic attacks, withdrawal, many various health problems, and in some cases suicidal feelings or actual suicide.

A boss, a colleague, or another member of staff may suddenly start picking on someone for a variety of different reasons, none of which are the fault of the victim. They may do it when no one else is around, making obscene comments, threats, or gestures, ensuring guilt and shame and therefore silence. The bully feels powerful, strong and in control. On the other hand, they may do it in front of a group of people, belittling, shouting, or even completely ignoring the person. This makes the bully feel big and powerful in front of others, and makes the victim feel isolated from the group, worthless and very often, stupid. Other members of the group may realise what is going on, but feel too frightened to speak up or defend the victim, in case the bully turns on them.

Bullies can work in other ways too; they can pick on someone in less obvious, but equally as hurtful, ways. Responsibilities may be taken away; deadlines may be brought forward at short notice, entitled leave may be denied, or forced to work longer hours without any reward. It may be that hard work is ignored, or as soon as a tiny mistake is made they are jumped on immediately and ‘disciplined’. Every day is full of dread and fear. Some people don’t realise that what is happening to them is actually bullying, as it is done so discretely, and so it is allowed to continue for some time. The victim is made to believe that what the bully is telling them is actually true. It may seem that there is no way out, no way to stop this monster, and no one to tell.

If you are being bullied at work here are some points to remember about bullies:

• Bullies are in reality cowards, and they need to feel that they are better than you, the only way they know how to do this is by bullying.
• Bullies are frightened that they will reveal to others that they are actually incompetent at their job and other areas of their lives, so to stop this from happening they pick on someone else.
• Bullies are control freaks and need to feel that they have the upper hand.
• Bullies are cheats, liars, deceptive and manipulative.
• Bullies are incompetent, jealous, bitter and angry.
• If a bully tells you that you are useless, incompetent, lazy, weak or any other negative aspect, they are actually talking about themselves.
• They will pick on your most vulnerable asset and make it out to be ten times worse than it actually is, this is to make you feel bad about yourself and it also makes you believe what they say.
• Bullies can be charming and very deceitful, making it difficult for the victim to be believed by others.
• Bullies thrive on fear, guilt, shame, embarrassment and most of all, silence.

Being bullied can have devastating effects, which can last for years after it has taken place. If you feel that you are being bullied or where bullied in the past, please don’t hesitate in getting help. Remember: it is the bully who is in the wrong, not you.







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Sarah Binding is a trained counsellor and is the founder of www.thepanicrooms.com. This is a support website for people who desperately need to talk to someone. The site is discreet, so members of the public cannot come in and nose around. There are trained listeners on the board who are ready to talk to you, support you and help you.

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