The Call to Grow
Author: Anne Benoit, M.A., M.A.T., C.H.H.C.

At the beginning of one's journey on the path to expanded levels of living and self-awareness, there is often much pain. Grief, depression, frustration, self-pity, and anger--all are common and can act as potential motivators to make necessary changes. In addition, experiences of scarcity and powerlessness in our interactions with the self and others can propel even the shyest, most passive soul to seek growth and personal change.

Sometimes, the beginning is simple: a declaration to God and the Universe that you have had enough; you are sick and tired of being sick and tired, and you will not accept this way of living any longer. Though nothing external has changed in that moment, the intention sets a powerful starting point for growth. On one level, it is an act of submission and surrender. The small self says, "I give up; I tried, and I cannot do it alone." On another level, it is an invitation for all that blocks you to be brought to the surface, acknowledged, explored, healed, and released.

This stage in the process can be considered purifying, which it surely is. Those parts of the self that no longer serve its highest vision cannot be given up until they are owned and claimed. This strategy of calling forth a growth path stems from paying attention to that "still, small voice" inside that speaks to you about your experience, fulfillment, and divine purpose which provides clues that you are living beneath your true nature. This step is one taken from the "inside-out" when you choose to no longer dull the pain and discomfort of your experience with drugs, excessive alcohol, workaholism, or love affairs but instead choose to feel your disappointment, fear, and frustration without armor--activating what Dan Millman calls "the path of the spiritual warrior."

The other potential motivation for growth and change is that moment when your life crumbles--namely, due to your own choices and reactions that are made or felt from a limited awareness. This is the time of crisis, the "dark night of the soul" so familiar to many of us. There may be lost jobs, divorce, addictions, death of loved ones, children injured by your own hand, or a myriad of situations in which we blindly move forward with little or no thought of consequence. At this point, we want nothing more than to stop the pain of the experience.

These crises can be mental or emotional (a breakdown), financial (a bankruptcy), or spiritual (a crisis of faith or belief). Often, these types of experiences result from some conflict or incongruence between our inner selves and our perception of the world. In many cases, these crises are precipitated by an attachment to living from the outside-in: allowing, even needing, the definition and validation of external people, things, beliefs, etc. to find value or worth in the self.

On this growth path, it is the outer world that shatters, forcing us to question what is truly important and meaningful to us. In the initial shock, we often ask, "how" or "why" these things happened. But later, the crisis could lead to deeper inquiry: What was my role in this? Where am I off track? What do I need to do--or be--differently so as to not repeat this outcome?

Although most would prefer the "smoother" path of the "still, small voice" nudging you to change direction, the crisis can be exceedingly effective in providing an opportunity to do some deep, necessary work on the self and moving toward a more peaceful negotiation of its relationship to the world.

Utilizing external circumstances as a springboard is a challenging path, but it remains the prominent one until the majority begin to live from the inside-out, acknowledging and following the prompts from spirit to stretch, grow, and continue seeking greater recognition of and clarity about our own divinity and power.








--------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Anne Benoit is on the faculty at Curry College and Emmanuel College in Boston. She writes on a variety of topics and offers seminars and workshops on personal, professional, and spiritual growth & development, navigating change, and empowerment. In addition, she is the founder and principal of In Focus Coaching.

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------