EXAMINE YOUR PRIORITIES IN THE WAKE OF TRAGEDY
Author: Pat Kilgannon, PCC, MEd

The aftermath of the tragic events of September 11 will stay with us forever engraved in our hearts and our minds. But as we begin to put the pieces of our lives back together, many of us find ourselves existing in a state of ambiguity. The old pieces of our lives just don't seem to fit anymore. While it was OK, before September 11, to, as one person told me "do what was necessary," it is no longer enough just to get by. It seems there has been a collective wake-up call for each of us to focus on what is truly important in our lives - to get our priorities straight and to discover our true passion and purpose.

As a nation and as individuals our lives had changed- forever. The concerns that once loomed so large and seemed so important in our lives and in our businesses all of a sudden seemed trivialized in the aftermath. The quarterly report one of my friends was so frantically compiling, the business deal being managed by a client, or even the speech I was writing for one of my business contacts paled in comparison to what had transpired. A client said to me "No matter what happens in our business on a day-to-day basis, it is not nearly as bad as other things that could happen. We'll work things out and survive. It's much more important to make the most of everyday. It a shame it takes something like this to make us realize that."

"Life is fragile" is the lesson another person shared that they learned from this tragedy. "We just don¡¦t know how much time we have or what is going to happen in the world around us." For many of us before September 11th our lives followed a path that was set forth before us. We moved along readily continuing to fulfill the expectations without necessarily giving it too much thought. But suddenly that changed. The circumstances of that fateful day initiated a subtle but far-reaching shift.

Still others are feeling a need to do something to help out or respond to what is going on around them. We watch in awe the heroics of the rescuers and support teams that continue to this day and so much want to do something to contribute. Somehow, in this case, donating money or blood just doesn't seem like enough and many are left with a feeling of helplessness. In many conversations I have had and speeches I have made since September 11th I remind people that one of the best ways they can help out and support the efforts is to be the very best they can be. No one else can be you or do what you do as well as you do it. As nation we are only as strong as the individuals that make it up.

They say good comes out of everything and the bombings in New York and Washington are no different. People are taking a new look at their own lives and asking questions. "Am I satisfied with how my life is?" "What's really important to me?" "Why am I here?" "What is my legacy?" For others there seems to be a constant nagging that sounds like: "I don't want to just stumble through life." "I want to know what I want to do with the rest of my life." Whatever form the message takes there seems to be this need to spend time and energy in a manner consistent with our priorities - to discover and uncover our true passion and purpose in life.

Passion is that particular something you instinctively know will keep you fulfilled. It is an intense inner desire that makes you feel amazingly alive when you act on it. Following your passion motivates you and gives you the energy to turn your dream into a reality. You are on fire from within. When you lack passion, you are at a disadvantage. You cannot focus, enjoy or be who you really are.

But in order to follow your dream, you must first find it. Uncovering your passion is like collecting pieces of a puzzle - each one reveals a bit of the bigger picture. If you feel unfulfilled or stuck in a life rut, here are five ways to figure out your life passion so that you can start getting what you want out of life.

STEP ONE: Take Time for You

Finding your passion means connecting your head with your heart, engaging that part of yourself that "feels" in a big, bold, spiritual way. For many of us, this is a challenge. Our busy, chaotic lives disconnect us from our feelings. And, when we act from this "numbed out" place, it's impossible to connect with our passions. Slow down, spend time with yourself, take good care of your body and mind, and your spirit. Engage in activities that will move you out of your head and into your body. One way to do this is to write. Often times things you were afraid to say out loud suddenly find a life of their own when they are put on paper. You will be amazed with the amount of freedom and honesty you discover.

STEP TWO: Go on a Treasure Hunt

Find your passion by paying attention to your everyday life. What you surround yourself with is an expression of your true self because we like to decorate with and collect the things that reflect our inner desires. Pay attention, for example, to the magazines you buy, the books you read, how you decorate your living space, and what you watch on television. If it is your passion, chances are you are already trying to incorporate this bit of bliss into your life. Do you buy sailing or craft magazines? Watch the cooking channel or sports TV?

In addition, make a list of the things that you look forward to doing on a regular basis. Do you find yourself spending your spare time working on cars or volunteering in your community? Do you get "turned on" by the idea of making something with your hands? In other words, what is your daily source of joy and how do you incorporate it into your life? Once you have identified the little things that bring you joy it is up to you to take it to the next level.

STEP THREE: Look To Your Past

Consider those things that were important to you in the past. One way to tell if something is your passion is if you had an affinity for it during childhood. What games did you like to play? What did you want to be when you grew? Remembering your dreams is an important step to finding your passion in life. Too often we throw away the dreams of our youth merely because we feel we need to 'grow up'. We devalue the dreams of the past and replace them with 'sensible and stable' plans of action that will get us to success and security. What would your 10 year old self think of where you are now? Is your life everything you imagined it would be? Making a list of dreams, desires or aspirations may help you to discover the one or two you are ready to concentrate on.

STEP FOUR: Answers Some Difficult Questions

Another piece of the puzzle to finding your passion involves creating a detailed picture of your most extraordinary life. To begin this process identify what success really means to you in- personal, social, professional and financial terms. Start by asking yourself these questions:

„Ï What are the top five things that you want to have, do and become?
„Ï What would I do if¡Kyou won Million in the lottery?
„Ï What if you only had 6 healthy months to live¡K how would you spend your time?
„Ï What would you regret not having done if your life was ending?
„Ï What do you want more of in your personal and professional life?
„Ï Who are the role models that you admire?
„Ï How would you like the world to be?

After answering these questions, read through the answers. Do you see any patterns? What's stopping you from moving forward with exploring your passion?

STEP FIVE: Take A Risk

Stop "thinking" about your passions and start doing something. Take a risk, and step out to try something new. Spend time doing what you love. Don't wait for next month or next year or until retirement. If your life's work isn't centered on your desire, then take time every day to move in that direction. Start with 15 minutes a day and move forward from there. Research the things you are most interested in, the things that give you energy. Find opportunities to participate in groups or communities with the same interests. Eventually you won't want to 'settle' anymore for merely plodding along through life. Your soul will have been fed by your actions and a new cycle of truly living will have been born. Remember, when you get to the end of your life, you most likely will not say, "I wish I had spent more time at the office".








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Pat Kilgannon is the founder of SUCCESS COACHING and President of the Philadelphia Area Coaching Alliance. Her passion is supporting busy people in achieving success without compromising their quality of life. She can be reached at 215-348-9192 or success@pil.net.

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